Friday, July 20, 2012

We'll find out.

A day of some success, and then... dead stop.

I didn't really do anything even vaguely creative today, but at least I did accomplish something. I'm booked to give a presentation at the College Music Society's convention in November, and (to make a long story interesting) I'll need to convert a pile of orchestral parts into a conductor's score, something that does not exist for the piece I'll be using to illustrate my point. I only have one more part to input (piano), that'll take a while, but then all I have to do is polish and then ... cogitate, on my presentation. Plenty of time, plenty of time.

So, that was the success. However, it came with a cost... Apparently, I can't really sit in a basic office chair any more. Or pretty much any chair with insufficient butt padding and legs not extended. I certainly can't sit in it for very long, at least. Not long at all... Many times, I had to excuse myself to lie down to recover. Spent a lot of "lie down to recover" time, today.

I'm hoping I'll be able to return to creativity, "soon" rather than "eventually." It was satisfying to be able to actually accomplish something, but... the cost was higher than I had hoped.

We know that we're going to have to deal with "different," once we're traveling the Neurological Highway... I wonder if today was perhaps a foretaste of what that "different" is going to entail. I should try to find something to ease the "sitting" challenge... not that I want to spend hours in a chair at a desk, but being able to spend any time in it without it sending me to the bed for recovery... that'd be good. Beneficial, even, given that theoretically, I would still like to compose music again. Or at least, so I think. Judy at Peace Be With You posits some very good questions about dreams and reality.

But now... dead stop. It's time to pack in everything. I don't need to sleep, but I do need to not "cost" myself more. Because the more I "spend," the more it costs, both tomorrow and today.

So, tomorrow and accomplishing accomplishments... It'll be—the same? Different? Both? Who knows?

We'll find out.


Katja said...


Laptop computer.

Some strategic pillows or foam wedges.

It's the way to go.

Judy at Peace Be With You said...

Thanks for the link. The tension between my dreams and my new reality is one I live with. But I have reinvented myself and with that new dreams. Always subject, of course, to the protean, if not pernicious, whims of MS. Which would start another round of reinvention. Etc. etc.

Muffie said...

So happy that you accomplished so much, but I understand how you "pay for it" later.
Have you tried an upholstered desk chair? Mine is pretty comfy!