Saturday, April 25, 2015

Just enjoy.

Birds can be messy.

But they don't give up. Frankly, having been watching them for a while, I don't think "give up" is in them. Anywhere.

Stuff hits the ground. Or just dangles. They just keep going. Because, basically, they ain't done yet.

This is good for us MSers to remember. It doesn't matter that these little birds do things messily. They don't care, or even notice. They definitely enjoy life, though... they're most enthusiastic about everything. Even dropping things.

As Ram ass has written, a tree doesn't care. Neither do birds.

So, why should we? Something drops. Keep going. Enjoy life. And don't care...

Just enjoy.

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Who can say?

A brief moment to check in.

I'm still immured by the goddam computer having been "improved" with a new OS which basically made said computer unusable.

Unless I want to use Guitar Band or some other Apple product which does me zero good. Which is pretty much what the machine does for me now; not counting the occasional bill pay or blog entry (like this one), my computer is not doing well with the "my" and "actually helping me make music" stuff.

I'm trying new help-me-out OTC Medical Things, which may actually be an improvement. From the way I'm not typing now, I think I'm done doing whatever it was that I could. Will more get accomplished today? As was quoted often in The Lord of the Rings, who can say?

Did I have other things to do? Both on the computer and off, such as enjoying a few moments in the sunlight, perhaps enjoying the front yard with the new wheelchair ramp on the front porch, or a jaunt around the back patio, in our backyard zen garden? Yeah, but will I be able to do them?

Who can say?

(Yes it is that bad right now. More later, certainly if we get out of the "that bad" zone.)

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Another "wow" weekend, not necessarily a "good" sort. But good, bad, who can say?

A fantastic spring concert was given at Oneonta Congregational Church. In it were featured many of my compositions, performed with heart-wrenching beauty.

I couldn't go. I was in really, really bad shape. I never left the bed during the concert; it was a good thing that I didn't go, I would have had the opposite of a good time.

There were pictures taken, recordings made, so I will soon (I hope) have something to share. From what I know, it was a wonderful wonderful afternoon.

And although I couldn't be there, their happiness still makes it wonderful for me. On a day kinda low in "wonderful."

And as I often tell you, I often "find the funny" in my current MS-ified situation, and I think this one actually is funny, so here we are.

I use medical marijuana (lots of things to talk about there, that's definitely another show), it is enormously helpful as a pain and spasticity reliever. Sometimes I get in so much pain that I can't stand to sit up in my wheelchair, therefore no sitting at the computer to do anything, much less what one could call as heroically "stuff." Sometimes too much pain to deal with sitting up in bed, makes me long to just lie down and fade away. Not die or such, but definitely just to fade out, maybe just Z into cuddly bed-ness.

But the correct dosage of the correct varietal (there are a lot of them and the varietal really matters when you're using it for pain relief rather than "crank up The Dead and let it fly" musical fun) means I can deal with sitting, even sitting at the computer, like I am now.

And here's the funny:

Remembering that I'm in a Medical Marijuana state, I'm totally within the law of the State of California... and that I'm actually using this stuff for medical reasons, two doctors telling me to use it, one of them calling it "neuro-protective," to deal with the pain & nonsense that is my experience of MS...

I have to smoke weed so I'm free of pain enough to sit up at the computer and therewith, via the Internet, order more weed.

And THAT'S how we treat MS in the 21st century.

Everything goes better with...