Sunday, August 26, 2012

Just one

Still on the "slow progress/no progress" track. Was able to stay up and seated and at the computer for quite a while today, and did a small piece of sound editing for a friend of mine (it was fun), and posted a Facebook "note" (which hardly counts as "valuable" but what I wanted to say was stuck in my head so writing it down got rid of it, pretty much, so it was worth it for that if nothing else). Showered and all that; gonna go out with the wife for a vegan Taiwanese dinner, and if all goes well, stop by a store for morning-breakfast-cereal milk. Did have to take to the bed for a while, but I got up and returned here, for (among other things) this.

Learned the other day that if something has the "O-U" kosher mark, it's non-dairy (gotta keep an eye out for "O-U-D" which is kosher but with dairy), so that'll be something else easier than poring through tiny-print ingredient lists, to help keep me on the lookout for Stealth Dairy. Which is pretty much in everything, alas. Also learned that challah is almost always kosher which means it's almost always non-dairy. Hooray--another bread I can enjoy! Not exactly all-purpose sandwich bread, it's usually pretty soft, but at least I like it and it's on the OK list. A good combination.

Acupuncture tomorrow. We'll see what happens. Recently, I've had a better couple of days post-treatment... it hasn't lasted, but two is better than none.

And I am being reasonably successful in the recent "at least do something" approach. Small changes. Sometimes too small, sometimes too infrequent.

But as a friend of mine who studied the Book of Changes says (that the book showed him), change the small to change the big. Oh, I've been through my share of big changes, especially recently--and I'm still dealing with the "processing" of said changes. But the truth remains, change the small, and that will create the change in the big.

Kind of the "domino" effect: push the first domino over. That's easy, pushing only one domino over.

Sometimes I don't have the energy, the gumption, even the stay-awake-long-enough-to-do-it-ness, to push one domino over.

But one? Even in my current state, one should be doable.

We'll see how well I can keep pushing over just one. Often I surprise myself, more than I expect get pushed over... but one? Should be easy, shouldn't it?

So... just one. Just... one.

I've done more complex things... why do I find "just one" so hard, right now?

Doesn't matter. As Yoda said, "Do, or do not. There is no 'try'." So...

Just one.

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