Consciousness

Well, to follow up on the last post and the hopes for another off-campus adventure...

Didn't happen, alas. I knew by the middle of the morning that it was a "sounds nice, but ain't happening" kind of idea. My wife did make it to the film, and apparently it was really quite wonderful.

I might have asked to be taken home by the time I got there. Leaving the house, the bed even, was not a good idea.

Oh well.

I do still have something to do today at home; a life coach will be making a house call. I look forward to our conversation... She always has great ideas to offer me, even if what I have to offer is in getting-things-accomplished terms a non-starter. In football terms, it's hard to coach a guy to throw a ball if he ain't got the strength to come to the field and just hold the ball.

And staying in that metaphorical world... again, I'm called to a consciousness change. I can condemn my own condition, and not even try to hold the ball, or I can recognize that just wrapping my fingers around the ball is a victory, even a small one. Can that become a throw? Again, gotta change consciousness... To take the victory in the simple "just do what you can" world, because even the best QB in the world can only do what they can.

It's not a deferred "just give up," it's the simple truth of the moment. Doing something is different from doing nothing. What comes of it? Doesn't matter, and doesn't effect the victory-in-itself of the moment.

I spend a lot of time in "don't even try because nothing can come of it" mode, and Lord knows I've brought "denial" to the level of a national pastime.

On the MS Highway, there's not much to be done in the "being afflicted by MS" world, we do what we can but does it do any good? Who knows, but we keep trying anyway.

Physician, heal thyself, as the Good Book says. And the first thing that needs to be changed is the only thing over which I have 100% control.

Consciousness.

It all starts there...