Dueling with "accept."
Somehow, I've always had problems with this word, this concept. What I make of it may be more than's there, but telling me to "accept" something, especially MS related, lights the fire under "push back."
But "admit" is easy. "acknowledge" is easy. And somehow, more useful, maybe even more powerful.
I don't need to "accept" that I have MS. But it's very very easy simply to admit that I have MS. To acknowledge that I have MS.
It's kinda like simply admitting that "I am currently sitting in a wheelchair, as I'm typing this."
Those are very very easy truths. Nothing bubbling in the background, nothing that fits into the category of "things I want to deal with but dan't bring myself to." It's simple and descriptive.
Does one ever need to massive-air-quotes ACCEPT that one is currently sitting in a wheelchair? Observationally, it's on the level of "Duh," anyone who could see me sitting in the wheelchair, would agree without layering implications, yes I am sitting in a wheelchair.
Now, if I want to be sad about being in the chair, that's another matter. If I want to presume that I'll never walk again, that's another matter. Each of those require significantly more effort than "merely observing," or as some might describe it, "witnessing."
I don't need to use what energy I have, what short time I have in our little world, choosing to delude myself about the horror of my life.
At Pops of Regular Show often says, "Bad show!"
Now where do we go?
Let's go for truth. As my beloved tympani teacher (now of blessed memory) once said, "Always tell the truth. That way, you only have to remember one story."
Sometimes, no matter what it may be, at the end of the day, truth might very well be...