Monday, June 28, 2010


... both forwards and backwards.

Forward: I'm having musical ideas again. They're not crystallizing yet, but they're cool. I gotta start writing them down (I'll probably start on one project as soon as I'm off "blogging duty").

And they're cool. At least, I think they're cool.

I drove my wife around town today. In the truck. Which I haven't done in months. She does most of the driving nowadays, she liked just riding for a change. Just like she did in The Good Old Days. Before... The Disease. (rumble, discordant rumble...)

Backward: I had some "miscues" with the clutch pedal while driving my wife. Nothing serious or problem-causing, but my wife hadn't experienced one of those before, and I'm sure it was even less fun for her than it was for me. And it was certainly no fun at all for me.

Nasty leg pains, because of the amount of driving and the time of day; early morning driving is easier, late afternoon (such as today), post much walking/standing/physical therapy/life in general, is not at all pleasant, and things hurt and cramp. Among other things too numerous to mention, but all of which are, as a simultaneous experience, quite unwelcome. Among other unpleasantnesses too numerous to mention.

Talked with physical therapist today about the yoga instructor's suggestion to get a second cane, if for nothing else, better symmetry. She handed me a second walking stick today and watched me walk with two, and she said I was much more balanced, and I felt like I was using energy more effectively, and thus using less energy, on locomotion. So, another "prop," is that a step forward (providing myself more efficient and better assistance) or backwards (needing more walking assistance)? Probably, on balance (forgive the turn of phrase), in truth it's a step forwards...

And there are a few at my workplace upon whom it hasn't quite yet dawned that "Robert isn't like everybody else" in more senses than twisted sense of humor, abnormally large vocabulary and wide skillsets, and penchant to spout Zen-like assessments, and maybe when he says he needs to have a little slack cut for him... he does. It's hard to spout things like "we need everybody to pull his own weight" when you're looking at someone who needs two canes to walk.

So, forward or backward, today? Net forward, I think... which is, if you're starting to wonder whether you have "slow decline" MS rather than "up and down" MS, motion forward, indeed.

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