Thursday, March 18, 2010

Strangely unmoved

I'm waiting for the show to start; curtain's in about 2 1/2 hours. I dislike few things as much as waiting for the show to start. Except those shows where I actually push the metaphorical "launch" button--when I start the show, I don't dislike waiting, I hate waiting. At least on this one, I will be given the "go" for launch, I'm not the only one turning the launch keys.

I'm completely out of energy, I still have a couple of things to do to the lights; one involves crawling up to the booth to fine-tune a couple of focus points, the others I can do at the board just by pushing buttons. Good thing, too, I'm totally sucked dry.

I realized today that, for someone with three degrees in music and compositions you can buy on iTunes, I rarely listen to music any more. I put an organ channel on Pandora this afternoon while I was doing some not-in-the-theater pre-show work (it's playing right now), and one thing that I notice that it does not fill me with is a burning desire to play the organ. It used to... if not a burning desire, at least a warm and cuddly glow. Now: nothing.

Then again, I don't really feel burning desires to do anything anymore. And by anything, I do mean anything. I don't know if I'd call that a "gift" of MS, but it's definitely a symptom of it.

Spring is the season of the Wood element, and I feel it starting to turn our way. Perhaps that'll give me something to burn...

We'll see.

No comments: