The five-element practitioners will speak of today's season, the season of Water, as a time with the power of "emphasis." Now, as a Fire guy, Water doesn't sing to me, ab initio, but oh yes, there's definitely a reason for the season.
And definitely one of the gifts–yes, gifts!–of MS is becoming much more sensitive to... everything. Everything. Two nights ago, I was sitting outside just to "groove on" the air and the season, and I could feel the Metal within the Water. For me, Metal (especially during the fall) has an almost electrical jag to it. It thrills me. It supercharges me. And yes, even in the season of Water which extinguishes Fire, I felt the Metal jag.
And yesterday, again sitting in the back just to groove on the air and the season, I got an Earth jag; the Earth within the Water. Earth is the mother of us all; it loves all of us, it loves every living thing, equally... the love of a mother that loves you more and more and yet, loves her other children more and more. And yet, it is still the time of Water, and I could feel that it was not simply the Earth vibe, but the Earth within the Water (each of the elements has the other elements within them).
I'm also going within and seeing things about myself that aren't... pleasant. At all. As the Cosmic Owl said to Finn on Adventure Time, "You messed up."
And so have I. And part of what is becoming my regular practice of sitting in the back enjoying my medicinal herbs is to tell the truth. Simply to tell the truth. Doesn't matter who hears it. Or if anyone hears it. What matters is that I tell the truth, unfettered by anything. By anything.
It's a useful practice... Especially if your habits tend to be thinking "and then THEY did [x]" or "THEY hurt me by doing [x]" or "THEY don't appreciate me" or, basically, "THEY" followed by anything.
But, really, although THEY do things that interface with YOU, what matters is what YOU did, and felt. So, we take THEY out of the equation... and just tell the truth. No conditions, no justifications, no explanations, no nothing but the Witnessed Truth.
What happens next... Is what happens next. But when you have seen through the eyes of the Impartial Witness, and seen yourself with those eyes... Everything is different.
I'll give you a quick example... moving out of "ego" mode into "witness" mode changes things puddling around the house in a wheelchair. Ego sees something sitting on the [doesn't matter] that's not in a convenient place for Ego. Ego says "That's in the WRONG PLACE." Heck, if could manage the humor of the South Park movie as Kenny was on the operating table, and one doctor shouts out "That doesn't go there!" I would at least be laughing.
Right place, wrong place, that's from Ego's point of view. But the bottom line is... it's there.
Definitely a challenge for dealing with all our MS Malfunctions and interactions with the world and devices and institutions and and and and... But our first job is simply to witness.
And tell the truth.
And why is that... hard? Ummm... Because that's our choice? We chose that path?
As the Cosmic Owl would immediately tell us:
You messed up.And as my kyudo teacher so simply and eloquently said, so very often...
Don't do that.A good reminder.